My life
That’s how I see my life: a whole lot of complex detail, needing attention, clouding my ability to see the big picture.
But what is the big picture? Viewed from a child’s perspective, the big picture is often what we are going to be when we grow up. When we have grown up, and become what we’ve wanted to become, we start looking for purpose, then depending on our belief, we might look at getting to heaven.
As a government, the big picture currently and generally is seen from a global economic perspective, but should it be seen from a planetary survival perspective instread?
What we see as the big picture seems to depend on perspective. In the scheme of things, perhaps we really are just grains of sand, all part of a whole, and the bigger picture is whatever we are capable of seeing or whatever we want to see.
My inability to see a clear big picture, is clouded because of my focus on detail, and probably a degree of fear….but that’s another story :). I’d like to see my life more like:
Pick me, pick me
My life; a whole, not just a whole lot of detail, and like the stamen of this camelia, the detail seems obvious for the picking. A bee or a butterfly will come along and know it’s the stamen it needs to land on and even more precisely which stamen is ready. Do they see the big picture and the detail and know just what to do, or do they just see the detail?
From the bees and butterflies perspective, or even our own perspective, what is the big picture here? Is it the stamen? Is it the Banksia or Camelia, is it the bush it came from, or is it beyond that?
To see the big picture, in terms of my future, presents me with way too many obstacles, too many impossibles, too much detail, to much detail missing. However if I look at the big picture, as a place of arrival, and ask myself, “now what?” I begin to see the camelia.
There are things that stand out just like ready stamen. The important thing that stands out, is my daughter. However, I see her as one of the bright beautiful petals that make up my life. She’s not one of the stamen, screaming for attention. If I look at the stamen in my life, screaming, ready for attention, the things that stand out, are my finances, and various things I’ve left incomplete.
Without the stamen, the bees and butterflies, there would be no polination, no more more camelias. What do I do, to keep my big picture living, growing? My finances are a mess. The obvious solution would be to get a better paying job. Not that easy or that obvious here in the Highlands at this particular time. What is obvious, is that I can finish my course! That won’t imediately solve my financial situation, but it may help in the not too distant future. Not finishing my course, robs me of that potential.
So the big picture as seen from the perspective of a camelia is:
See the camelia in the first place - for me the here and now, that’s my big picture.
Look at the bigger picture (in my case, the here and now) and see what details stand out.
Choose a detail that keeps change and growth flowing.
Act.
So my committment to action begins tonight. I will begin revision!
Joanne
So much in looking at the big picture seems to be perspective, which is so subjective, and thus confusing at times. I do like the idea of petals on the flower, each a part of our lives, beautiful, and contributing in such an important way to the whole.
I also like your idea to finish your course, education of any kind is something that is always yours, always contributing to growth. There is no denying that, thus its value. Maybe it’s even a flower in itself … Best wishes on your forward motion!
Jun 09, 2009 @ 12:13 am
phd in yogurtry
I so agree about finishing the educational goals. And also about the uncertainty that financial hard times can create. Anxiety leads to doubt and doubt can be overwhelming at times. I’ve been there many times throughout my schooling and career. Hang in there. Your flower will bloom, yet!
Jun 09, 2009 @ 2:17 am
Talon
Brigit, it’s like a series of building blocks - without a good foundation it all comes crumbling down. And like all good foundations, it takes thought and planning and patience.
I hope your revisions went well!
The camelia is gorgeous! I love the colour. And what sort of flower is the first photo? I’ve never seen anything that looks like that.
Jun 09, 2009 @ 3:20 am
Jen
Sounds like you are engaged in the act of blooming right now - should be an exciting time.
One of my good friends is also taking a course - in Math!- and can’t see any immediate benefit, but needs it to fulfill a requirement so that she can do what she wants to later on. It’s such a struggle, but like you, she’s sticking with it. Hang in there.
Jun 09, 2009 @ 8:21 am
brigit
Joanne - The course is definitely a flower. Once completed I’m sure will have its own stamen, and the process goes on.
Phd in yogurtry - I think anxiety often comes from the way we tend to look at the big picture. Looking at where you are now as the big picture, makes the next step more obvious.
Talon - I think a solid foundation is what is missing in lots of things today. We seem to focus on amassing rather than foundation.
The flower is an Australian native Banksia. There are 77 species of Banksia most of which grow in Western Australia. This is one of the species that grow here in the east.
Jun 09, 2009 @ 9:20 am
Talon
Thanks, Brigit. Really neat flower - really unique shape and look. I find native plants so intriguing!
Jun 09, 2009 @ 1:41 pm
Buddha of Hollywood
We start as a seed. Then a young link.
Then we flower. We have fruit and then we die.
The whole thing is becoming.
Finding who you are.
Cultivating your talents and fulfilling your destiny.
I know I am being pedantic but things are as simple or as complicate as we make them to be.
Just do it - as you said - and have fun while doing it - if you don’t have fun you are doing it all wrong:)
Namaste!
Jun 09, 2009 @ 4:21 pm
brigit
Jen - I actually quite enjoyed doing the course. It’s just getting back into the groove after stopping isn’t easy. How lucky I am that my course isn’t maths!
Jun 12, 2009 @ 8:38 pm
brigit
Buddha - Interesting thought. I know I often great satisfaction in doing what I’m doing, but having fun with it is a different story, but perhaps you’ve planted a seed. Thankyou.
Jun 12, 2009 @ 8:44 pm